Greatest Generation: We beat Germany in grenade toss and landing beach volleyball and crushed Japan in the bombathlon.

Silent Generation: Must defeat Soviet cheaters to prove our Way of Life is superior (though our kids really should learn math).

Baby Boomers: America is the underdog but we always win because we defied our parents and really deserve this! I’d like to teach the world to sing, and we can have it all! The whole world is united, to watch America win!

Gen X: Rigged commercialized bullshit.

Millennials: Where’s my Audience Participation Gold Medal? Give me a trigger warning before anybody loses.